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ADDDICTED TO LOVE

Why We Can't Get Enough Sex And The City - The Boca Raton Observer - JUNE/JULY 2008

IF YOU ’ VE BEEN WATCHING SEX AND THE City reruns for the past four years and wonder whatever happened to Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda, then wonder no more. The feisty friends are now on the big screen appearing in Sex and the City The Movie.

And that's pretty big news for most of us - bigger than the Super Bowl or even New Year ’ s Eve. That's because the sex, the city and the fab four are once again providing front- row seats to their glamorous, fast-paced lives. Yes, the girls are once more hitting the pavement in sassy stilettos and designer outfits, a martini in one hand, the other on the pulse of New York City.

And that's what makes these fictional characters so alluring: They have fun, hang out and push the drama of everyday life to its outer parameter - all while teetering along the uneven streets of city reruns for the past four years and wonder Manhattan in five-inch heels. And while the characters are fictional, there’s a bit of Samantha, Carrie, Charlotte and Miranda in us all.

“Sex in the City is an amazing satire with a lot of reality to it ’ s says Dr. Susan Lee, a Palm Beach County psychotherapist and sexual relationship expert. ”Many women would like to be like them and have casual sex. They also long for love and commitment from someone they can trust . . . real women (like the Sex and the City characters) are looking for ’ the one ’, but they end up having to kiss a lot of frogs first.”

You don ’ t have to convince Boca Raton publicist Elizabeth Kelley Grace that dating dramas like those on Sex and the City are not realistic. “A friend of mine set me up on a blind date with a guy who was newly divorced,'' she recalls. ”The morning after we met, he called and asked me out and I accepted. Later I found out that he had asked out - and gone out with - four other women he met at the same party.”

Grace recalls another Sex and the City moment, when during dinner with a friend, she realized they were dating the same man. “While having dinner he started sending text messages to both of us saying exactly the same thing . . . ’ Hey sweetie I miss you. I ’ m thinking about you. ’ At first we were stunned, and then we burst our laughing. Needless to say, neither of us went out with this guy again.”

The show ’ s characters - sultry Samantha in particular - also opened up a whole new era of sexual liberation for single women. In the fab four ’ s world, one-night stands are acceptable, and there ’ s little heartache when the ’ good one ’ gets away. Rather than moping, they find solace in friendship and irreverent banter. It ’ s this bravado that makes them our heroes.

And it ’ s this brand of loyalty we all envy and want to emulate. “My favorite scenes were where the four girls would meet at a restaurant for emergency breakfast meetings to discuss their plights, ” Grace says. “Every conversation they had, we had about boyfriends, ex- boyfriends, parties, what to wear, good dates, bad dates, weight loss, marriage, divorce, pregnancy, babies and shopping. ”

“Sex and the City is based on sexuality and how to hook up in the dating world.” observes Lori Sarvis, a certified sex therapist and licensed clinical social worker in Deerfield Beach. ”In the show we got to see how men and women date and where they hooked up. It also showed us how very different men are from women.” She adds, “There ’ s a lot of sleeping around these days. And more women are finding that they can have casual sex without getting attached. ”

With the film now in theaters, we can only anticipate what Sex and the City’s latest trickle- down effect will be. One thing is certain: It will be interesting. in theaters, we can only no be interesting.